Life goes on....

 

My stepsister Susie passed away Sunday. Shes not sick and hurting any more. She's with my Dad and Jesus.

I’m feeling so sad and very tired. Overwhelmed by all the things that me and my family members have to face over the next 4 weeks. I’m very worried about my step-Mom. I feel so sad for Susies husband and sons too. :( I’m not feeling especially eager to do much of anything this week or the next few weeks …but… I’ve made commitments to people that I have to keep and I’ve many tasks I need to take care of for myself too. I just want undisturbed sleep, non-stop for a few days. I won’t. I can’t. But I want to.

"Ain't no shame in holding on to grief, as long as you make room for other things too"

I see today that my Visa application has made some progress. It has finished what it needed to do for Ghana and is now on its way for Togo to do its thing. I should be excited and happy about this progress but I’m too tired right now.

I am praying now and will be often that God will guide and invigorate me as I finish up the last of the details before I leave for the trip. Today, right now... I have no want or will to do anything but I know God will help me. (1 more shot, visa, plane arrangements to/from the group rendezvous site, gathering and packing my clothes, supplies and gifts, getting my house in order and my dog stuffed into my suitcase. )

I'm praying that God will open my eyes, ears, mind and heart to Him in a special way during this grieving period and while on the trip.

I'm praying for my fellow trip members, that they too will be open to all that the Lord wants to do in and through them during the trip and that we all become great friends.

I'm praying that God will use me as an ambassador for Christ (thats so cool. :) ) - that I represent Him well as I interact with the children, Compassion staff, my fellow travelers and anyone else God brings across my path during the tour.